The Momnificent™ Blog

Who You Are Makes a Difference

In this season of gratitude, don't forget to let everyone know they make a difference to you.  You, readers of my blog, make a difference to me and many other people.  Let's spread the blue ribbon!

Blue Ribbon Movie

Look Honey, We Made People

If I had ever paused to think about it, I would have seen this coming.  However, there were too many “Mom” things to do along the way for me to notice. 

I guess it dawned on me a couple of months ago, when I was standing in our living room talking to my kids.  While there is nothing unusual about that, every aspect of it  was different somehow.  

Though we stood face to face, my two daughters, Crystal,  age 23, and Malloree, age 14, were forced to look up to my 21-year-old son, Andrew.  I cannot recall the subject of our conversation, but it was refreshing to realize that it seemed to matter what each of us was saying.  We were not interrupting each other, and approached one another almost as equals.

Somewhere near the end of this moment, even taking the risk of ruining it, I yelled out to my husband, Thomas, in the other room:

“Look Honey, we made people!”

This fact should not surprise me.  I suppose that deep down, I believed they would always be viewed as our kids – and that I would be the extension cord that connected them to the outside world.

Thank goodness I was wrong!

I definitely never wanted them to depend on me for everything.  But it does start that way in the beginning, and quickly continues on in a marathon of laundry, school projects, dance recitals, studying for exams, athletic uniform pictures, sports picnics, learner’s permits, fender benders, first boyfriends or girlfriends, followed by first heartbreaks, proms, college applications, and then finally, graduation from high school. 

In order to survive this whirlwind, a Mom sometimes feels as if nothing can happen unless I am there to make it happen.   

Thankfully, it is not up to us, as parents, to be with our kids every step of the way or to chart out their futures.  If that were the case, I fear that I would hold them back.   Any plans I have for their futures would be tainted with “Mom emotion” and my desire to keep them close to home.

But, as my kids have grown, I have instilled in them the fact that God created them and he will show them what paths to take, since his plans are the only ones that really work out in the long run anyway.  

Now that two-thirds of my kids have moved 750 miles away, that doesn’t stop the “Mom emotion” that makes my heart long to see them again. 

But, I rest in the fact that God knows what he is doing, and he has done an amazing job with them so far.    

Apparently, he must have known they would grow into people all along, and I trust him to finish what he started.

Janet Morris Grimes is a Christian wife and mother of three from Nashville, TN. Recently relocating to Michigan through her husband's job transfer, she has chosen writing as her profession, admitting that "sometimes we chase our dreams, but other times, they chase us, wrestling us to the ground until we finally surrender to their power." View her blog as she chronicles this journey on "Writing for the Pursuit of Sappiness" at www.janetmorrisgrimes.com.

Momnificent! Weekly Tips and Quotes

Every week I give you a daily tip and quote on Facebook and Twitter.  In case you missed them, or you are not following me on Facebook or Twitter, here they are:

Momnificent! Tips of the Day

10/12 – Plan early, simplify and avoid holiday stress this year.

10/13 – Be aware of your perfectionism tendencies and how they are affecting your life.

10/14 – What are you tolerating in your life?  Consider stopping.

10/15 - Enjoy some simple pleasures today - hot chocolate, a child's laughter, a good book, or anything else that warms your heart.

10/16 – Forgive.  Forgive yourself.  Forgive others.  Forgive God.  Forgive.

Quotes from The Momnificent! Life

10/12 – “When we focus on what we like about our children, they will like themselves, and we will receive more of what we like”.

10/13 – “Telling the truth puts us on the road to acceptance – acceptance of ourselves and others”.

10/14 – “Two minds committed to the same goal are always better than one”.

10/15 – “Love is a matter of choice, and love is an action, not a feeling”.

10/16 – “Regular self-care will help you be a better mom, and without it, you will eventually reach burn out”.

3 Questions to Ask to Maintain Better Balance in Life

Balance is such an elusive and mystical concept for many moms.  With schedules jam packed with work, parenting, household chores, and extracurricular activities, it’s no wonder many moms give up on the idea of living more balanced lives.  The truth is most moms still desire balance, on some level.  Answering and acting on these three questions can make a difference in how balanced you feel, internally and externally.

What are your values and emotional needs?

Life becomes unbalanced when we are not living in integrity with our values.  For instance, if you value creativity, but aren’t taking time to express this value in your life, there will be a void that creates imbalance for you.  Often times, a mom will feel internal stress when her emotional needs are not being met.  Whether you have a need to communicate, a need for order, or a need to feel secure, making sure these needs are met on a regular basis is crucial to living a balanced life.

How high are your expectations?

Many moms want to do it all.  They want to be their best at everything.  When you feel like you are not meeting the high standards you have set for yourself, guilt sets in, and you move further away from experiencing balance in your life.  Figure out what is most important to you, and do those things well.  Let some of the tasks and activities that have lesser importance slide a little.  Practice grace and compassion for yourself.

What is causing stress in your life?

Stress is the number one factor that will upset the balance in your life.  Whether it is parenting challenges, work or commuting demands, or time and organization issues causing stress, identify those stressors and take steps towards minimizing that stress.  Practice consistent self-care even if you feel like you don’t have time.  When you regularly nurture your emotional and physical health, balance will naturally return to your life because your ability to cope with stress increases.

Momnificent! Helps Feed Starving Children

If there is one thing that continually tugs on my heart, and brings me to tears, it is knowing that there are innocent children all over the world who are starving.  They didn't ask to be brought into this world, but they are here, and they are forced to deal with the circumstances in their lives.  I know, from listening to my heart, that I am here on this Earth to make a difference in the lives of these children.  I have a heart for children and I want to follow this calling in any way I can.

Feed My Starving Children is an organization I have had the opportunity to serve with.  It is a fun, hands on organization that gets the community involved in helping feed starving children around the world.  Currently, they have four packing facilities, including one in my home community, Aurora, Illinois.  Their mobile packing programs allow people all over the United States to help pack food for starving children, and 94% of their donations go towards their food programs.

With a big leap of faith, I have decided to donate 5% of sales from Momnificent! University to Feed My Starving Children.  I started giving randomly to FMSC earlier this year, but decided it was time to make a regular and consistent contribution.  So far, Momnificent! has provided 1,892 meals for children, and I hope that number continues to grow over the years.  At least now I know I am doing something to help with this global crisis.

Overwhelmed with Gratitude

This morning I was making the long trek to Barrington, Illinois to speak to a group of 60 moms on the eight essential ingredients of living a magnificent life.  As I was driving, one of my favorite songs came on the radio.  Of course, I always have to sing.  I began to belt out the words to this song, and what came out was choked up words as I was hit with an overwhelming gratitude for my life and what I get to do.  There is no greater passion than knowing you are living your life on purpose, doing the work you were called to do.  I began to think about the opportunity that laid ahead of me.  Would my message be heard?  Would I make a difference in the life of a mom?  Would my life lessons be able to help another mom?  When you speak in public, you always run the risk of being loved, or of being judged for who you are and the ideas you have to share.  But as I reflected on this song, I was reminded that it didn't matter because I was loved - loved by the most powerful Being in the Universe - God.  I thought I would share the song I was listening to - the song that fills me with gratitude every time I listen to it.  I hope, you too, will be blessed and know that you are loved!

Free eBook for Homeschooling Moms

Has the new school year started with gusto at your house?  Or guesses?  "I guess we'll use this curriculum.  I guess we'll start on Monday.  I guess we'll use this folder, and I guess we could try unit studies this year."  Does any of this sound familiar?

Get ready to plan a year of enthusiastic homeschool learning with consistent input from the Lord!  Take the guesswork out of your planning, systematically organizing your homeschool this year with the eBook:

The New School Year:  Planning Your Course and Letting the Lord Determine Your Steps

The Old Schoolhouse Magazine offers The New School Year.....FREE!

Now's a good time - grab your free eBook!

Something to Smile About

Today I have a video that was emailed to me by one of my previous clients.  Watch it to the end and drink in every word.  Guaranteed you will be smiling.

Send Godly Love this Holiday Season

When our church announced an opportunity to sing in a choir that was made up of singers from different community churches, I jumped on it.  I love to sing, and I especially love worshipping God with soulful, gospel music.

Last night our church and three other neighborhood churches sponsored an event called Love Fox Valley.  The purpose of the event was to minister to the underprivileged families of Aurora, Illinois.  Many of the church families sponsored over 300 children from the area to provide Christmas presents to these families.

What was truly a blessing in this busy holiday season was not the presents, but seeing the love of God spread across different socioeconomic, cultural and racial lines.  In one room, for two hours, we came together to share our lives and to celebrate our humanity and the desire of God's heart - to be one under God.

In God's eyes, we are not different.  Only we, as human beings, see other people as different from us.  Only human beings judge people as being rich and poor, black and white, beautiful and ugly.  But underneath all our outwardly differences, we are all God's children and He loves us all the same.

During this holiday season and always, may we see people with God's eyes.  May we take the time to love our fellow man the way we would want to be loved.  A smile, a touch on the shoulder, a kind word, or a nonjudgmental and loving thought can go a long way towards healing this world.

One Month to Live

What if you were told you had 30 days left to live?  That is the question I have been asking myself lately.  Not because I am morbid and think about death, but because I am reading the book One Month to Live as part of a church-wide challenge.

Most of us don't think about this question because we are convinced we have much longer to live.  One mother of young children came face to face with this question while sitting in her local coffee shop.  She was sitting enjoying a cup of coffee when she heard some noise behind her.  Turning around to see what was going on, four armed and masked men yelled, "Hit the floor now!"  I don't know about you, but I know the first thing I would think about was whether or not I would see my family again.

Fortunately, for this mom, she received a second chance to reconsider her life and how she was living it.  The authors Kerry and Chris Shook break this concept of 30 days to a no-regrets life into four elements:

Live Passionately

Are you passionate about the life you are living right now?  Are you following the dreams in your heart or have you lost those dreams to everyday life?  Are you spending your time in exactly the way that is most important to you everyday?  Aside from quitting your job, how might you be living your life more passionately?

Love Completely

We all know relationships are most important to our lives, but we don't always act that way.  We struggle to find time for the important people in our lives.  We fight over insignificant things and some of us are still holding on to past hurts, unable to forgive.  How might you love differently if you were told you had 30 days left to live?  Who might you want to make amends with?  What might you move out of the way so you could be available to love your family and friends?

Learn Humbly

How much time do you take really getting to know yourself?  Have you stopped to consider what direction your life is meant to go?  Life is filled with lessons; lessons about who we are, who others are, and what our purpose is here on Earth.  Are you growing in the ways you want to be?  Are you open to learning or are you stuck in your ways?

Leave Boldly

I think leaving bolding has everything to do with leaving your legacy.  What do you want people to remember you by?  What kind of mark do you want to make on this world?  Do you believe you have the ability to make a difference? 

I know this is not an easy question to look at.  The fact of the matter is though, our time here is limited, and none of us know when our time is up.  What would you be doing differently if you were to live a no-regrets life?  How can you make the most of every single day you are given?  I would love to hear your thoughts on this subject.