My Teenage Daughter is Great, but She Cusses and Slams Doors in the Morning

Q.  What I would like to ask is about my daughter who just turned 17. She is a great, sweet person, smart with straight A's this semester, beautiful and in great shape, helpful, great with children, but the one problem she seems to have is she has so much energy and when combined with her temper, well her emotions sometimes run away with her and the most recurring problem is in the morning when her Mother tries to wake her for school, sometimes she will cuss and scream and slam doors. I've listened to it for years and have talked and talked to no avail. I have no patience for it any more and feel hopeless about it. Any advice?

A. Your daughter is 17 years old, and your wife should not have to be waking her for school.  Your daughter should have an alarm clock that wakes her for school, and should be relying on that to get up.  If she doesn't get up on her own, she should be suffering the consequences of that behavior.  There will be consequences from the school, and those may ultimately trickle down to consequences at home.

For instance, if she misses the bus and needs a ride, then she gets charged a cab fee by mom or dad (you decide how much that is).  Or if she gets herself to school, but the truancy's eventually start affecting her grades, then you may have to take away privileges if she is not maintaining the grades you expect her to maintain (whatever those expectations are).

If there is a rule in your house that your kids are not allowed to cuss or slam doors, then you better start enforcing that rule.  When things are calm, sit down with your daughter and tell her.  "The rule in our house is no cussing and no slamming doors (but make sure you are following the same rules)"  The next time it happens, you will lose your privileges.  Then take away what's important to her (her cell phone, the car privileges, going out with friends, etc.), until she can show respect when she is angry.

That's my teenage advice. :0)